I am tired right now. I had a slew of duties to tend to at Wondercon – and by duties, I mean interviews with celebrities. I didn’t come out and say that because I didn’t want to sound braggy, pompous and most of all, I didn’t want to sound like one of those people who uses my role as a journalist with easy-access to A-listers to make up for the fact that I have no actual personal life.
But I will get to that later.
Nonetheless, yesterday, I was in the city walking to Bloomingdale’s to use my $25 gift card to buy a $199 messenger bag. Of course, I was smoking a cigarette, like I always do when I step outside of any building. Anyways, two guys stopped me and asked me for a light.
He said, “We need to light a blunt.”
I played it cool, but I was honestly a little frightened. They were drenched in Jamaican colors, but the thug like silhouettes made them more urban Americana. I wasn’t scared at the fact that they were black. I was scared at the fact that I may be considered an accomplice in an illegal drug use incident.
Would I be considered an accessory to a crime? Or maybe they just said “blunt” and meant cigarette.
But then the guy lighting the supposed blunt had trouble starting it up. His friend endearingly said, “Haven’t you ever lit a blunt before?”
I still kept on assuming it was a cigarette in order to save myself from an illegal activity.
He successfully lit the blunt and they thanked me by saying, “Thanks for supporting a ‘higher’ power!” with his fist in the air and a light giggle.
I shot them an awkward smile and looked around for any cops. Were these two kids on a “21 Jump Street” mission to bust an unassuming person? The unassuming person being me of course.
Well, I threw my paranoia over my right shoulder, like salt for good luck. I figured that my little act of pyro-philanthropy was my community service for the month because I would like to think these two young gentlemen had a case of glaucoma.
I must sleep. Well, I’ll sleep after I watch the rest of Kiss, Kiss Bang Bang.
And no…I didn’t find a new messenger bag.