The Woos and Woes of ‘Alice in Wonderland’

Photo credit: Disney Enterprise

The movie: Alice in Wonderland

Directed by: Tim Burton

Based on the books by: Lewis Carroll

Adapted for screen by: Linda Woolverton

Famous people and voices you would know in the movie: Johnny Depp,
Helena Bonham Carter, Anne Hathaway, Crispin Glover, Matt Lucas, Stephen Fry, Michael Sheen, Alan Rickman

The new girl in town: Mia Wasikowska steps into the blue frilly dress as Alice. Cinephiles might recognize her from roles in Defiance or Amelia.

What I wore to the screening: Black April 77 jeans, sky blue 3.1 Phillip Lim button-down shirt, Calvin Klein combat boots, vintage pea coat, and American Apparel jersey scarf.

The story: If you haven’t the slightest idea of the “Alice in Wonderland” stories, then you probably were deprived of literary culture as a child – but there are minor tweaks to the books and the original 1951 Disney version. In this “updated” 3-D spectacle, Alice is older and goes back to Wonderland after having no memory of her previous visits as a young child. When she gets there, she stumbles upon the usual suspects (Mad Hatter, Chesire Cat, Red Queen, Tweedle Dee, Tweedle Dumb et al) and then finds out her predetermined responsibility to slay the Jabberwocky (voiced by Count Dooku a.k.a. Christopher Lee) Side note: this Jabberowcky is not to be confused with the winners of the first season of America’s Best Dance Crew.

All my independent ladies throw their hands up: The movies bases its moral around believing in the impossible and being a pretty female empowerment. When Alice doesn’t wear a corset or stockings with her doily of a dress, it paints a real nice before-her-time feminist picture of her. Cliché, but understandable – and Wasikowska executed it the best way she could.

The story doesn’t match the flair: Carroll’s stories will forever be classics, and this new adaptation was an unbalanced mix of exciting and generic. It’s as though Burton thought we would be distracted by the awe of the visuals and that we wouldn’t care about the story. Sure, I tend to divert my attention to “how did they do that!” computer generated fluffiness, but when the characters just become talking heads it just becomes a big ol’ video game.

A semi-sweet treat for my eyes: The bells and whistles of the CG-meets-live action was mesmerizing and was a delicious sugary confection for the eyes. As for the 3-D, it is the “in” thing to do these days in Hollywood. Soon we will see porns in 3-D. It courses through the veins of this movie, but the pulse starts to slow down 45 minutes into the movie. It grows stale. The only exciting parts where objects jump off the screen are the introductory Disney logo in the beginning and the part where Alice falls down the rabbit hole.

Character breakdown: Depp’s Mad Hatter role was the driving force of the film- unfortunately it only went 30 mph. Yes, we all know he’s great, but seeing him dressed like a clown for a warehouse rave wasn’t exactly the cup of tea I wanted to drink. Helena Bonham Carter does a great self-absorbed Red Queen that screams “Off with their head!” really well (multiple times I might add – perhaps too many times). Anne Hathaway’s White Queen was like watching a classic Disney princess pumped full of hallucinogenic drugs.

McFly? Is that you? Crispin Glover played Stayne – Knave of Hearts, but he will forever live in my heart as George McFly from the Back to the Future franchise.
The most unnecessary part of the movie:That pop and lock dance that the Mad Hatter performs towards the end. Very painful.

Overall critique: From the bulbous head of the Red Queen to the Gumby body of Stayne to the schizophrenic accents of the Mad Hatter, the disproportionate screen tricks were great for a cinematic acid trip – too bad that disproportion applied to the magic and enjoyment of the film. Grade: C+