The Story of ‘Safe House’ Told in Pictures and Captions

I work in a safe house in Cape Town where we interrogate and house bad people. It's a shitty CIA job.

My hot girlfriend doesn't know.

Hey, get off your ass we are bringing in a really bad dude to your safe house. We are really important people who wear suits, speak sternly, and hang out around sophisticated computers all day.

Yeah, this dude we are bringing to your house is REAL bad guy. Keep in mind, I don't look suspicious at all.

I'm in your house and I'm very clever and manipulative. I'm like the black Hannibal Lecter. I will fuck your shit up.

Yeah. I heard about you. I'm kind of scared of you.

OH NO! He escaped.

I gotcha! Let's go for a ride to a crowded soccer stadium so I can find instructions for where to take you. This is kind of fun! It's like a scavenger hunt. You drive.

DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE MY SIGHT! I am your babysitter. If I lose you, I am in deep shit.

OMG! I lost him! Where did he go?! I better run faster so I can find him. I hope my bosses don't get mad at me.

That's OK dude. We'll take it from here. You obviously don't know what you're doing because you're not that great of an agent.

I AGREE! Please keep in mind, I'm a really important person in the CIA and I am NOT a suspect of treason.

Hey baby. I have to break up with you because I work for the C.I.A. Sorry I didn't tell you. Go to Paris and I'll meet you later. I need to capture Denzel. I need to go prove myself to those people who wear fancy suits and that dude who looks like Mad Eye Moody from Harry Potter. I am tired of being a worthless safe house person.

That pretty white boy don't know where I am. Give me some fake IDs so I can leave the country.

Hey Ryan, I am wearing a really pretty trench coat today. Anyways, did you find Denzel yet? You better find him soon because I think someone -- I am guessing that Mad Eye Moody dude -- might kill me soon.

I know exactly where Denzel is! I'm going to befriend him because I did some research on the Internet and talked to him and I think he is the good guy. I suspect that someone in the C.I.A. is up to foul play and Denzel is just trying to make things right. I'm pretty sure that Mad Eye Moody dude is a bad guy. Denzel may have unorthodox ways of doing things, but I want the truth to be told.

I am glad you figured it out. And I am glad we became friends. I'm still a bad ass mother fucker.

...and I'm the Green Lantern.