The obvious answer is ZOMBIES. That said, the next big thing is the movie adaptation of Isaac Marion‘s novel Warm Bodies (which I wrote about in May 2011 — I hope you were paying attention). The movie should be on par with the refined, yet hip voice of The Hunger Games, and lightyears less constipated than that Twilight thing.

In any matter, the movie adaptation is directed by 50/50‘s Jonathan Levine and tells the “love story” of R (Nicholas Hoult) who still hasn’t TOTALLY turned undead and his developing relationship with a gal named Julie (Teresa Palmer).

Necrophilia arguments aside, take a look at the first official picture of Hoult as R:

Hmmm. He doesn’t look like a zombie. He just look like a hipster after an all-night rager.

[Source: Collider]

Reading Suzanne Collins‘s young adult book trilogy The Hunger Games was a life-changing event for me. First off, it made me realize that the Twilight books were really, really, really badly written (although I think I caught on to that on my own when I realized that the term “Russet-colored skin” was used in the series about 500 times).

Nonetheless, the movie adaptation has been a constant source of discussion on my blog and it won’t stop until March 23, 2012, when the dystopian story about teens battling until the death comes to a theater near me. The trailer has raised the bar and I, as well as many other Hunger-ians have skyrocketing expectations for this franchise that has the potential to rule 2012. They better not screw the pooch on this one.

Read more of my “Best of 2011″ list here.

How in the hell do you make a pregnancy guide book into a movie? For starters, you put a gaggle of celebrities in it — that’s what What to Expect When You’re Expecting did.

For some odd reason, the all-star cast does not scream “LOOK AT ME I’M FAMOUS” as much as the grating New Year’s Eve and Valentine’s Day movies do. The cast includes a stellar roster of peeps including Elizabeth Banks, Brooklyn Decker, Dennis Quaid, Anna Kendrick, Chace Crawford, Rodrigo Santoro, Joe Maganiello, Chris Rock, Rebel Wilson, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Thomas Lennon, Ben Falcone, Cameron Diaz Matthew Morrison, and Jennifer Lopez. I kind of groan at the inclusion of the last three, BUT Rebel Wilson’s presence makes up for them.

Check out the trailer and let me know your thoughts (which I’m sure will be BRILLIANT!):

I could recite a list of could of, should of, would of’s for The Rum Diary, but that would just be too whiny. Instead, I will just straight out tell you my opinion of the movie: I only kind of enjoy it. As for the story behind the movie — I enjoyed it a lot more.

The Rum Diary is based on the book by Hunter S. Thompson and is inspired by his experiences in Puerto Rico in the ’60s, but the book didn’t get published until 1998 — thanks to the movie’s star Johnny Depp. He found the unpublished manuscript in Thompson’s Colorado home.

Depp was buds with Thompson and starred in his book-turned-movie Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, an acid trip of a film that kept in line with Thompson’s gonzo style.

In The Rum Diary, Depp plays journalist Paul Kemp departs his New York home to live in Puerto Rico and work at a local newspaper and the dangerous and comical adventures that come along with it. Along the way, he drinks lots of rum (hence the title) and meets lots of characters birthed from the mind H.S.T.: an absurd cock-fighting sidekick (Michael Rispolia); a filthy druggie who likes listening to Hitler records (Giovanni Ribisi); a high-strung editor with a wig (Richard Jenkins); a douchey, crooked, and handsome business man (Aaron Eckhart); and a vampy/borderline skanky love interest that’s off-limits (Amber Heard).

I understand that this movie shouldn’t exactly be like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas because this is a totally different story. I did feel the H.S.T. vibe flowing through the veins of the movie, but it was an unexpected softer side.

There are some FANTASTIC one-line jabs that showcase the H.S.T. cleverness (i.e. “You are a waste of human sperm!”). There are also some great scenes that will surely quench your thirst for ass-happy absurdity (one tongue-laden trippy drug scene, a hemaphroditic oracle, Johnny Depp drinking out of a fish bowl). The pieces for a brilliant off-beat movie are all there and you would expect the gonzo adventures to gloriously sweat and salivate off the screen — but it doesn’t. Instead, it dry heaves.

The Rum Diary opens in theaters today.

Dear Harry Potter franchise,

As I write this, millions upon millions of people would have seen (or are currently seeing) the final installment of your 10 year journey that took us to Platform 9 3/4 at Kings Cross Station to the magical halls of Hogwarts to the Quidditch arena to the Ministry of Magic to Gringotts to Hagrid’s Hut and all the way back to Platform 9 3/4 at Kings Cross Station.

It all came full circle when I watched a screening of the final film earlier this week. I didn’t cry (although my friend Antoinette did), but I was touched. It was like saying good-bye to a friend that you grew up with who you know you will never see again. You will only see them in pictures to relive memories, but the novelty of the friendship has ended — and you don’t mind.

Wow. That was a real precious moment. I really hope you appreciated that. My softer side doesn’t come out that often.

Nonetheless, during the movie, my gut was twisting and turning knowing the fate of certain characters. I anticipated their big moments and was more than ready for the big battle scenes — but before I get into that, I have to admit something to you: I never read the books. Yes. You heard that right. I am a big ol’ Harry Potter-ite poser. I just watched the movies and thought it would be easier than reading. I wasn’t a big reader in 2001. I was too busy not going to class at Texas A&M University and trying to change the world as a Filipino militant in Jnco jeans.

But that is neither here nor there. I am here to talk about you and how you (the Harry Potter franchise) changed my life.

The weeks leading up to the premiere of the final movie, I tried to perfect my raspy and congested impersonation of Voldemort and was studying spells that would never work because I am a Muggle and because they are not real (Did you know RICTUSEMPRA! is a tickling spell? For some reason that just grosses me out.)

When the time came to watch your final installment, I was excited. While watching, I was obnoxiously shouting the words “YA-YA!” every time Professor McGonagall came on screen; I giggled during the scene where Ron and Harry were shirtless; I kept reiterating the fact that Draco was a little bitch and his dad is a former member of Nelson; I desperately wanted Bellatrix to call 1-800-DENTIST, and tried to point out every minority in the movie (there was one black dude who I constantly pointed out to my friend Jojo) and, of course, I shouted “ASIAN!” every time Cho Chang came on the screen.

That “19 years later” epilogue was quite a treat. It made me come to the conclusion that Ron and Draco hang out a lot at the Three Broomsticks and drink pitchers upon pitchers of Butter Beer. Harry doesn’t join them — and it shows because of the absence of a Butter Beer belly. Plus, I don’t think Ginny allows him to hang out with them. I also think she verbally abuses him — but that’s a whole other story.

Here are some other immediate tweets I shared after watching:

It’s been about 2 hours since I finished the final Harry Potter movie and I still can’t get the image of “old Draco” out of my head.

My favorite Harry Potter spell is “SPUCATUM TAURI!” or any spell that would put my opponent in a skanky halter top and boot cut jeans.

I’ve been doing some thinking and came to the conclusion that all of my Horcruxes would be different breakfast pastries.

It was a great way to end it all. Perfect even. It was the double bar line to an coming of age opera of magic, angst, spells, charms, fantasy and round-framed glasses. It didn’t need anything more or anything less. It was like a big warm hug and a gentle pat on the ass.

All in all, I couldn’t help but think, “Wow. We are no longer going to see Harry Potter on screen anymore. What am I going to do to fulfill my young adult novel movie adaptation fix?”

There’s always Twilight — but that is almost over and is just a hellacious constipated vampire fantasy that is nothing but pop culture porn. There’s also The Hunger Games which I am excited for — but there will never be another Harry, Hermione and Ron…or a movie adapted from young adult novels that included some of the BEST actors in the world. (They are the best because of the British accents.)

In 2001, when I first saw The Sorcerer’s Stone, I thought, “What the hell is this? Why the hell should I care about a bunch of wizardly bebe’s kids?”

I never really took you seriously. I just saw you as some sort of Sweet Valley High mumbo jumbo with a wand-wielding twist.

Little did I know, you would become a worldwide phenomenon that would have middle-aged men dressing as members of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slytherin camping out days before the opening of the final film and making me feel uncomfortable when I pass.

I began to see your appeal with The Prisoner of Azkaban — thanks to Alfonso Cuarón. He ignited a flame that added insight and maturity to a franchise that could have grown into a magical mess. After The Goblet of Fire, I tattooed a lightning bolt on my brow and conjured up my patronus — which ended up being a one-legged hooker.

I know that you wil be forever in my life — much like Star Wars and Back to the Future, but I am truly going to miss you. Very much. Very, very much. It would have been nice to see what would have happened at Hogwarts with the offspring, but why bother? Plus, if it didn’t work for Saved by the Bell: The New Class, then it probably won’t for anything else.

Well, it’s been great seeing you for the past decade. In the immortal words of Oprah “Jesus” Winfrey, “I won’t say goodbye. I’ll just say, until we meet again” — or until you come out a a full collection on Blu-Ray complete with a commemorative wand.

LYLAS,
Dino

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 opens in theaters today

Today, the experts of celeb fashion ridicule (and praise) Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan of GoFugYourself.com will be making an appearance at Macy’s Union Square in San Francisco — and I had the opportunity to interview them beforehand for SFGate.com.

Yes, this post is purely about shameless self/cross-promotion.

But here’s a fun excerpt from the blog post I wrote for SF Unzipped:

Jessica: Talking about celebrity outfits is entertaining! If it gets to the point where I find it doesn’t amuse me anymore, then we will be in a bad situation. We always say our job is to create procrastination material for people who have really important jobs.

Heather: I will never be bored with looking at pretty clothes. And I will really never be bored with looking at insane clothes. We always rub our hands together with glee when it’s awards season. From the Golden Globes to the Oscars to the Met Ball — which is probably the best than all the other ones combined. If we ever get bored of this, then I’ll just quit and move to Canada and buy an alpaca farm.

You can read the full post at SFGate.com.

Here are the full details on the event:

WHAT? A shopping event with fashion bloggers Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan, creators of Go Fug Yourself! You will also have the opportunity to meet the bloggers as well! Spend $50 or more in Bar III apparel and receive a copy of “Spoiled” and have your book signed!

WHEN? 6 p.m. Thursday, June 16

WHERE? Macy’s Union Square in San Francisco, Impulse Department, Level 3

In The Hunger Games, Cinna is Katniss’s flamboyant, yet subdued & serene stylist that preps her “catching fire” look for the Games. During the course of the story, he becomes a confidant of the heroine and is a fan favorite.

Whilst reading the description of Cinna, an image of figure skating sensation Johnny Weir popped into my head. But alas, fans started throwing Cillian Murphy‘s name around and I immediately hopped on that bandwagon.

In April, one of my go-to sites for “Hungry” news, TheHob.org, shared a bit of news about Woody Harrelson, Stanely Tucci, and Lenny Kravitz being considered for major roles in the movie. I let this stew in my crock pot for a while, but thought that out of all three, Kravitz would be good for Cinna — so I waited in anticipation for the “official” announcement.

But wait. This story gets more exciting.

I obsessively and obnoxiously post casting announcements on my Facebook page to alert my fellow Hunger Gamers about the progress of the movie. It also annoys all my other Facebook friends. That said, when they announced the casting of stylists Octavia and Portia on Monday, I posted it on my wall and the following conversation ensued:

Later that evening, my friend Melissa posted this on my wall:

Boo yah. My self-worth has been validated. And the fact that I get joy out of analyzing and predicting the casting of a movie based on a series of young adult novels about a dystopian world where teens fight to the death doesn’t make my life sad AT ALL.

If you don’t know already, I am an avid fanatic of The Hunger Games. It brings out the angsty teenage girl in me. That said, I have been watching the casting announcement of the movie adaptation like a obsessive stalker. Elizabeth Banks and Stanley Tucci have snagged pivotal roles in the flick and they just announced Woody Harrelson has been cast in the role of the beer-bellied and disgruntled mentor of Katniss (who will be played by Jennifer Lawrence), the heroine of the series. I have to say that TheHob.org is right on top of this news — and anything and everything else that has to do with “Hungry” news. The people who run this site are pretty damn dedicated. This makes me ask the question, “I wonder who would win in a smackdown between Hunger Gamers and Twi-hards?”

If you finished The Hunger Games series and are looking for a more “adult” chaser, chew on Warm Bodies — and I am not saying that literally. Written by Isaac Marion, the book is about zombies told from the point of view of a zombie. He falls for a non-zombie girl and — well — it’s quite offbeat and an excellent read. A movie adaptation has been set for 2012 and it stars Nicholas Hoult as R, the zombie hero of the book. It’s not as angsty as some other pop lit. Actually, it’s way more mature. Plus, if Stephenie Meyer likes it, it must be really good, right? RIGHT?

Bridesmaids opens in theaters on Friday. I’ve watched it twice. That should say something about how brilliant it is. I also watched it twice in hopes that Judd Apatow (the producer of the movie) would retweet one of my desperate tweets of praise about the movie. That makes me cool.

There are some real issues concerning uprisings and things of that matter going on in Libya — not to mention the diffused danger in Asia — but I am just not that smart to articulate my thoughts on real issues.

But perhaps those real life situations may be in line with the geist. Everyone wants to fight for what they believe in — even if it is wrong and crazy.

Lately, there seems to be a heavy amount of revolt — but they are on different levels. First we got the obvious one: Mr. Charlie Sheen. He is revolting against the world and he ain’t actin’ right.

In the musical theater realm, there is the seminal classic of French revolution, Les Miserables which is currently celebrating its 25th anniversary. I stumbled upon PBS and was treated with the concert version of the musical that includes the Jonas brother with diabetes (he does a fantastic job as Marius) and an encore that has the entire lineage (i.e. the important ones) of Jean Valjeans performing “Bring Him Home.” And contrary to the rumor I was spreading via Twitter, I did not play Gavroche in the original London cast — but feel free to think that it’s true. I will not deny it.

In other musical theater revolts, Julie Taymor announced that she is jumping ship from the Spider-Man Turn off the Dark musical — which has proven to be the ultimate expensive catastrophic orgy of song that everyone MUST see. It’s not really a “revolt” per se, but she is walking away from something she started. That is kind of a revolt, right?

Then we have the Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins, which basically satiates the literary prepubescent
Twilight and Harry Potter glands of all ages. It’s the latest young adult novel to hit the bookstands — and I am jumping on the bandwagon late. The series of three books tells the tale of a post apocalyptic world where teens fight to the death and soonafter, the heroine’s actions cause uprising in the world — that’s the long and the short of it. In addition, the casting rumors for the movie adaptation are all over the net. The books basically tell young adults that it is OK to revolt. It’s better that they learn it from literature than on the streets.

…and let’s not forget Battle: Los Angeles which comes out this Friday. Aliens invade. Humans fight back. What a way to celebrate human rights.

At first glance, Never Let Me Go has nothing to do with Asians. Actually, there isn’t really a trace of any Asian-osity throughout the entire film: Carey Mulligan isn’t Asian; neither is the new Spider-man/Brit-boy du jour Andrew Garfield. If you put Keira Knightley in an unfocused lens, she can look kind of Asian. Other than that, there is nothing Asian about this movie — except the writer of the book in which the movie was based: the Japanese-English author Kazuo Ishiguro.

The most I know about Ishiguro is what my high-brow classy colleagues have told me. When they were talking about him, I just nodded my head, raised my eyebrows and said “Mmm-hmm — I totally agree.”

I was a big ol’ poser.

But I did know one thing about him: he wrote Remains of the Day. And that is considered a brilliant book. In turn, he is a brilliant writer. Therefore, Never Let Me Go is a good book. And by the transitive property, the movie is a good — and I can vouch for that.

Click here to read more.