Last night, the singing/songwriting misfits had to create a rap song about a superpower they would like to have. The twist? They had to combine it with another genre. As usual, they started off with the hook challenge, which made me come up with the following equation:

LYRICS ABOUT SUPERHERO POWERS + RAPPING = GREAT POTENTIAL FOR EMBARRASSING MOMENTS

My equation was correct. There were many cringeworthy moments — and not only with the white folk. But Jackie definitely takes the crown for most uncomfortable. It’s the equivalent of watching her accidentally fart in a hot box yoga class full of people.

That aside, here are a couple more snap judgments of last night’s episode:

Nick “Self-Proclaimed Douchebag” Nittoli: In each episode, he looks more and more like Wesley Snipes’s character in Demolition Man, it’s only suitable that he is the villain of the bunch:

Singer/songwriter romance: The John Mayer-ish Johnny and the crochet hat-wearing indie gal Jes have a boner for each other. Their romance is the what SXSW love stories are made of. They just need to do it and get it over with.

Jackie likes crackers: It’s kind of creepy that Jackie looks like a scientific hybrid of Ke$ha, Alanis Morissette, Natasha Bedingfield, and Katy Perry — but her incessant, self-deprecating use of the word “cracker” in her rap hook was just so — ghetto.

Jewel: Her new glam makeover doesn’t really make up for this:

High-wattage, important music people make cameos: I wonder how much they paid Rodney Jerkins to be in this episode.

“Walk Through Walls” by Johnny featuring Scotty and Jes: When Johnny sang the hook in the beginning, I was utterly embarrassed, but when he performed it full-out he was pretty darn good. There were only two embarrassing moments int he performance: Jes’s “swagger” and the fact that they kept on calling Johnny a white Ludacris:

“Miss Make the Boys Cry” by Sonyae featuring Nick and Melissa: I love me some Sonyae. If she was at a wedding and started a “Cupid Shuffle” line, I would so join in.  And P.S. I like how they kept Melissa’s spotlight minimal during the performance:

“Super Duper Rapper” by Jackie featuring Amber and Brian: Oh lord this was was painful. The only good thing about this song was the gold fanny pack:

Bye, bye Amber: Brian and Jackie SO threw Amber under the bus. The result? She went home. On the bright side, we still get to see Jackie used by her fellow contestants as a source of ridicule.

The delightful little PR devils of “Kell on Earth” (from left): Emily Bungert, Andrew Mukamal, Kelly Cutrone, Robyn Berkley, Stefanie Skinner

I finally caught a rerun of Kell On Earth and I came to the conclusion that Bravo has finally thrown something against the wall that sticks.

This still does not make up for The Fashion Show or Launch My Line.

However, this show about Kelly Cutrone (head of the big-time PR agency, People’s Revolution) is enthralling, entertaining and is the total antithesis of the aforementioned second-rate fashion designer reality TV duds. It shows the grittiness of the industry. It shows how fashion is NOT as glamorous as people think it is. It shows that people actually do work very, very hard to get things done in a world where people THINK they can cut it – and Kelly illustrates that without any discretion.

The best part of the show is that Kelly looks like a normal human being. She is not glammed up and botoxed out like some sort of supermodel or magazine editrix. In fact, she kind of looks like Darlene Conner from Roseanne – but that’s besides the point. The point is that Cutrone is running a business and she knows how to do it – and she does it well. Very well. It’s a well oiled machine (despite the Chado Ralph Rucci RSVP snafu in the series premiere) and she will scare all those “passion for fashion” types into taking a second guess about making fashion their career. To top that off, she’s a working single mother – the show definitely broadens its demographic with that nuance.

Who would’ve thought that a hard-working, tough-as-nails, F-bomb dropping PR mogul could fill that Project Runway void Bravo was desperately trying to fill?

…or am I just jumping the gun? Thoughts?

This song has been in my head from the moment Kim drooled the words out of her mouth a couple of episodes ago. It’s infecting me like H1N1. I feel disgusted at the fact that I actually sing along to this song, let alone watch the joyous drivel that is The Real Housewives of Atlanta. That said, I wanted to pass it on to you – if you don’t already have it. Think of it as a friendly form of the plague.