Today is the day. The Hunger Games opens in theaters. Many of you may have lined up for the midnight screenings of this movie about a dystopian future where kids are plucked from their “districts” and forced to fight to the death. It is wonderful. So wonderful that I decided to make a list of 20 reasons why you should watch this movie:

1.) Finally! A non-skanky female role model!: Katniss Everdeen, The Hunger Games heroine is portrayed with heart, scrappiness, and tolerable feminine angst by Jennifer Lawrence. Katniss is exactly what the world needs right now. She hard-working, selfless, can kick some ass, and has a good head on her shoulders (and how about that signature braid of hers?) I’m pretty sure she’s the distant cousin of Ellen Ripley.

2.) Peeta and Katniss sitting in a tree…: The casting of Josh Hutcherson as Katniss’s partner in crime and potential love interest, Peeta Mellark may be up for debate, but the fact that we can call them TEAM PEENISS makes everything right.

3.) The dude from The Last Song/Thor’s brother: He also goes by the name of Liam Hemsworth and he’s dating Miley Cyrus. He also wears a snazzy vest in the movie too!

4.) Gary Ross, expert YA storyteller: Director Gary Ross (who gave us movies like Seabiscuit and Pleasantville took an epic young adult series of books and adapted it to an well-composed, ambitious, emotionally gripping, and appropriately violent movie. Within the first 10 minutes of the film, he sells you this messed up dystopian world and actually makes you want to be there.

5.) Kids killing kids: The whole idea of forcing a bunch of kids into an arena to kill each other is actually a good idea for population control.

6.) Haymitch, the lovable drunk: Kudos to Woody Harrelson for injecting swag into public intoxication.

7.) Effie Trinket, the talking scoop of sherbert: She looks like a clown at a Lady Gaga rave, but Elizabeth Banks steals every scene as Katniss and Peeta’s publicist.

8.) Cinna, the most non-flamboyant stylist ever: For being a stylist in the Capitol, he sure does have a tame sense of style — which makes him stand out. Plus, it’s Lenny Kravitz. He could be wearing a pair of Crocs, pleated khakis and an Affliction T shirt and still look good.

9.) The futuristic clown people of the Capitol: The swanky privileged people of the Capitol look like they are wearing an orgy of costumes from The Fifth Element and the futuristic scenes of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. Costume designer Judianna Makovsky outdid herself here. The poor districts look unbelievably homely, while the rich district look like a Kenneth Branagh production of a Lady Gaga video.

10.) Seneca Crane’s facial hair: The swirly shave of the gamekeeper’s beard and stache is awesomely douchey.

11.) The bullies of the games: The evil girl from The Orphan, the dude Race to Witch Mountain, Dennis Quaid’s son, and some girl who goes by the name Glimmer — collectively, they are the Billy Zabka of this movie.

12.) Rue: I love how the movie makes you fall in love with her and then (SPOILER ALERT) kills her right in front of your eyes.

13.) The soundtrack and score: The music in the movie is pretty amazing. Taylor Swift even has a song on the soundtrack. It would have been great if she made a cameo as a tribute in the games. Her special skill would be playing the banjo and then acting melodramatically shocked when someone stabbed her in the chest.

14.) The two and a half hour runtime: The movie inches toward the three hour mark, but if you could endure an old woman talking about a boat sinking boat in Titanic, then you sure as hell can watch the joy of a teenage bloodbath. Plus, it’s just more fun!

15.) Katniss’s weapon of choice: The bow and arrow hasn’t looked this sexy since Legolas in Lord of the Rings.

16.) The iPhone game: If you haven’t played the Hunger Games: Girl on Fire game on your iPhone, then you are missing out on a good time suck.

17.) Stanley Tucci as Caesar Flickerman: As the blue-haired Master of Ceremonies of the games, he is absolutely RIDICULOUS. It’s brilliant!

18.) President Snow: Donald Sutherland stars as the corrupt, evil-on-the-down-low President Snow. He scares me.

19.) The accurate art direction: The movie painted the EXACT picture that I imagined when I read the book. That said, I feel that I should take all the credit for the film’s look and art direction.

20.) It’s not The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2: I think I have said enough.

The Hunger Games opens in theaters today…as if you didn’t already know. Go watch it and fulfill your duty as an American citizen.

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