Please notice Eli Manning’s hand placement in this picture.

Now that we got that out of the way, the Super Bowl tweets were popping up like boners at a slow dance at a junior high prom. The tweets were possibly even in more abundance (and more entertaining) than that of the Oscars or the Golden Globes. The topics of choice were Eli Manning’s facial expressions, Tom Brady’s hot wife, Madonna’s half time World Peace extravaganza, and, of course, Clint Eastwood.

It was kind of difficult to find tweets about the SAG Awards last night. I don’t think many people tweet about them because the award statuette is scary. It has no face. NO. FACE. It’s like The Blank from Dick Tracy.

Anyways, I did manage to round up some REALLY good reactions from some of my favorite tweeters. Since The Help received so many awards, it got a lot of attention…as it should have.

The Grey opens in theaters on Friday and it serves up a hearty dose of America’s favorite gruff Irish action star Liam Neeson manhandling a bunch of blood-hungry wolves in the snow-stormed wild. But little do people know, this isn’t Liam’s first run in with the feral canines. Check it out:

I accidentally woke up at 5:15 a.m. this morning and thought I would just stay up and watch the grand announcement of Oscar nominations by Jennifer Lawrence (a.k.a. Katniss Everdeen) and A.M.P.A.S. President Tom Sherak.

I fell asleep five minutes later.

I woke up about two hours later and read the nominations. I automatically recognized a couple of snubs: Young Adult, Drive, Adventures of Tintin, and 50/50.

I had a brief “WHAT AN OUTRAGE!” fist-in-the-air moment and then I remembered something more important: what cereal to eat for breakfast. Here are the categories that normal people care about (to read the entire list of nominations, click here):

Actor in a Leading Role

• Demián Bichir in “A Better Life”
• George Clooney in “The Descendants”
• Jean Dujardin in “The Artist”
• Gary Oldman in “Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy”
• Brad Pitt in “Moneyball”

Actor in a Supporting Role

• Kenneth Branagh in “My Week with Marilyn”
• Jonah Hill in “Moneyball”
• Nick Nolte in “Warrior”
• Christopher Plummer in “Beginners”
• Max von Sydow in “Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close”

Actress in a Leading Role

• Glenn Close in “Albert Nobbs”
• Viola Davis in “The Help”
• Rooney Mara in “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”
• Meryl Streep in “The Iron Lady”
• Michelle Williams in “My Week with Marilyn”

Actress in a Supporting Role

• Bérénice Bejo in “The Artist”
• Jessica Chastain in “The Help”
• Melissa McCarthy in “Bridesmaids”
• Janet McTeer in “Albert Nobbs”
• Octavia Spencer in “The Help”

Animated Feature Film

• “A Cat in Paris” Alain Gagnol and Jean-Loup Felicioli
• “Chico & Rita” Fernando Trueba and Javier Mariscal
• “Kung Fu Panda 2″ Jennifer Yuh Nelson
• “Puss in Boots” Chris Miller
• “Rango” Gore Verbinski

Directing

• “The Artist” Michel Hazanavicius
• “The Descendants” Alexander Payne
• “Hugo” Martin Scorsese
• “Midnight in Paris” Woody Allen
• “The Tree of Life” Terrence Malick

Music (Original Score)

• “The Adventures of Tintin” John Williams
• “The Artist” Ludovic Bource
• “Hugo” Howard Shore
• “Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy” Alberto Iglesias
• “War Horse” John Williams

Music (Original Song)

• “Man or Muppet” from “The Muppets” Music and Lyric by Bret McKenzie
• “Real in Rio” from “Rio” Music by Sergio Mendes and Carlinhos Brown Lyric by Siedah Garrett

Writing (Adapted Screenplay)

• “The Descendants” Screenplay by Alexander Payne and Nat Faxon & Jim Rash
• “Hugo” Screenplay by John Logan
• “The Ides of March” Screenplay by George Clooney & Grant Heslov and Beau Willimon
• “Moneyball” Screenplay by Steven Zaillian and Aaron Sorkin Story by Stan Chervin
• “Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy” Screenplay by Bridget O’Connor & Peter Straughan

Writing (Original Screenplay)

• “The Artist” Written by Michel Hazanavicius
• “Bridesmaids” Written by Annie Mumolo & Kristen Wiig
• “Margin Call” Written by J.C. Chandor
• “Midnight in Paris” Written by Woody Allen
• “A Separation” Written by Asghar Farhadi

Best Picture

• “The Artist” Thomas Langmann, Producer
• “The Descendants” Jim Burke, Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor, Producers
• “Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close” Scott Rudin, Producer
• “The Help” Brunson Green, Chris Columbus and Michael Barnathan, Producers
• “Hugo” Graham King and Martin Scorsese, Producers
• “Midnight in Paris” Letty Aronson and Stephen Tenenbaum, Producers
• “Moneyball” Michael De Luca, Rachael Horovitz and Brad Pitt, Producers
• “The Tree of Life” Nominees to be determined
• “War Horse” Steven Spielberg and Kathleen Kennedy, Producers

Nonetheless, I scoured Twitter to see what people had to say about this year’s nominations. They are definitely more arousing than the nominations themselves:

I have now found what I shall be reading for the rest of the day. (I’m kind of a slow reader, so this will be very time consuming).

[Source: Vulture and Downton Abbeyonce, naturally]

So there are talks of a Bridesmaids sequel without the Kristen Wiig. I am pretty sure I heard a collective grown around the world when this news was announced. It’s not the fact that Kristen Wiig won’t be involved, but it’s the fact that this idea exists. Did we not learn anything from The Hangover Part II? What about that heinous pile of dookie known as Sex and the City The Movie Part II. Then there was Teen Wolf Too!…actually, I kind of liked that one. SURVEY SAYS: BAD IDEA

The Hollywood cookie cutter machine is hard at work with yet another remake. This time, Boys Don’t Cry director Kimberly Peirce is circling a Carrie redux. Based on the caliber of Peirce’s work, I actually don’t mind this collaboration. She can definitely elevate this classic movie based on the Stephen King novel. She definitely won’t turn it into remake mess like that of A Nightmare on Elm Street. SURVEY SAYS: GOOD IDEA

The “Shit Girls Say” trope has been pillaging the Internet and the parody of a parody, “Shit White Girls Say…to Black Girls” by Franchesca Ramsey has probably popped up on your Facebook timeline more than once today. I am sure that MANY of your friends claimed to be the first one to discover it — but let it be known that I was the first one to discover it. SURVEY SAYS: GOOD IDEA

On New Year’s Eve, you will usually hear me saying something like, “I don’t care for New Year’s Eve anymore. That’s why I don’t go out.” That translates to: “I don’t do anything because I am lazy, boring, and being in crowds makes me feel awkward, creeped out and makes me pee in my pants a little.”

This year was a little different because of my adoration for Twitter. In addition to my brilliant tweets on Saturday, my introduction to 2012 shall forever be remembered because of these tweets:

HAPPY NEW YEAR FOLKS!

It’s the holidays which means that many families will be reading “Twas the night before Christmas” before good ol’ St. Nick comes down the chimney to deliver presents. To make things a bit more fun, perhaps you should guzzle a couple of drinks before reading the classic tales to your kids. It will make things a lot more fun like this dramatic reinterpretation starring Ryan Gosling, Eva Mendes, and Jim Carrey:

[Source: FunnyorDie.com]

SF Sketchfest has announced their lineup and it is quite fantastic if I do say so myself. Celebrating it’s 11th year, the San Francisco Comedy Festival will be honoring Eddie Izzard and the Upright Citizens Brigade. In addition, this year’s roster is filled with some top-notch performers that will spread joy, hilarity and possibly some awesomely offensive humor to the great city of San Francisco. Performers include Drew Carey, Jennifer Coolidge, David Cross, Rachel Dratch, Chris Elliott, Will Forte, Elliott Gould, John Hodgman, Sally Kellerman, Marc Maron, Bruce McCulloch, Christopher Meloni, Laraine Newman, Bob Odenkirk, Amy Poehler, Paul Rudd, Molly Shannon, John Slattery, Kevin Smith, Reggie Watts, Fred Willard, The Groundlings, the geeks behind w00tstock, as well as the creators of Wet Hot American Summer.

The event starts January 19 and continues through February 4, 2012. Over the 17 nights, comedians will invade over 15 venues around the city.

Check out the FULL SCHEDULE by visiting www.sfsketchfest.com and get your tickets while the gettin’ is good. (Translation: Get them before they sell out). Tickets range from $10 to $75.

In the meantime, check out this little video just because it is fancy…and there’s animated blimps!

More info about SF Sketchfest:

SF Sketchfest, co-founded and directed by David Owen, Cole Stratton and Janet Varney, produces the eclectic San Francisco Comedy Festival, an internationally-recognized and critically-acclaimed event that mixes major comedy stars and the best up-and-coming comedians from around the world for three weeks of sketch, improv, stand-up, alternative comedy, films, tributes and panel discussions. SF Sketchfest offers its audiences the rare opportunity to see their favorite performers in intimate live performances and discussions.

In past years, SF Sketchfest has featured renowned comedy artists such as: Aziz Ansari, Fred Armisen, Dan Aykroyd, Dana Carvey, Margaret Cho, Zach Galifianakis, Monty Python’s Terry Jones, Conan O’Brien, Amy Poehler, Paul Reubens, Amy Sedaris, Garry Shandling, Robin Williams and “Weird Al” Yankovic. The festival has also hosted film and television stars: Will Arnett, Candice Bergen, Dick Cavett, Bud Cort, Danny DeVito, Jon Hamm, Neil Patrick Harris, Cloris Leachman, Jason Segel and Gene Wilder; ensemble comedy groups Kids in the Hall, Mr. Show, Mystery Science Theater 3000, The State and the Upright Citizens Brigade; and musical guests David Byrne, Gordon Gano, Aimee Mann and Michael Penn.

Venues include: The California Academy of Sciences, The Castro Theatre, Cobb’s Comedy Club, The Dark Room, The Eureka Theatre, Hemlock Tavern, Marines’ Memorial Theatre, Mezzanine, The Palace of Fine Arts Theatre, The Punch Line Comedy Club, The Purple Onion, The Regency Ballroom, Roxie Theater, Yoshi’s Oakland and Yoshi’s San Francisco.

SF Sketchfest welcomes back returning sponsors SF Weekly, Sheridon Keith Design & Photography, Adult Swim, Sara Holt, CidLang Media, PS Print, StreamSend and Rooftop Comedy.

As we all know, Lenny Kravitz will be playing the visionary soft-spoken stylist Cinna to Jennifer Lawrence‘s Katniss in the HIGHLY anticipated The Hunger Games.

The following video doesn’t have anything to do with that, BUT it’s quite entertaining. Watch Lenny go H.A.M. as he gets angry at things such as traffic, linoleum, and walnuts:

[Source: Vulture, Funny or Die]