Friends with Kids seems to have imported actors from Bridesmaids (Maya Rudolph, Chris O’Dowd, Kristen Wiig, Jon Hamm). It also seems like it was cut from the same “thirtysomething relationship crisis comedy” cloth. AND it has Megan Fox in a skanked-down role. That means I will TOTALLY relate to it.

Check out the trailer:

This will probably be known as the “Who’s that blonde chick hanging out with the cast of Bridesmaids and that dude from Parks and Recreation?” movie.

It seems like it was only yesterday that Brett Ratner slurred his way out of being the Academy Awards producer…and it was that same yesterday that Eddie Murphy flaked on being the host.

Well, fear not because here’s the first trailer for the Feb. 26 telecast of the 84th Annual Academy Awards featuring Robin Williams, Josh Duhamel, Megan Fox, William Fichtner, Vinnie Jones and, of course, replacement veteran host Billy Crystal. Enjoy the parody of cinematic fun…and make your snarky comments below.

Sacha Baron Cohen continues his reign as a fearless comedic thespian in The Dictator. As opposed to his documentary-style movies Borat and Bruno, he takes the feature film route. Alongside co-stars, Anna Faris, Ben Kingsley, Megan Fox, John C. Reilly and J.B. Smoove, Cohen takes his knack for envelope-pushing social commentary as a ridiculously bearded oppressive dictator who is hellbent on preventing democracy from coming to his country.

Any movie that manages to poke fun at international relations AND have a self-deprecating Megan Fox gets me aroused.

I can’t wait for this movie to offend people.

Eminem‘s new video for “Love the Way You Lie” featuring the vibrating echoes of Rihanna was released last week and it got like 30 gazillion hits in like 5 minutes on YouTube.

Okay. That’s an exaggeration — but it did get a lot of hits.

It got so many hits because it features Merry the Hobbit/Charle from Drive Shaft shoving his tongue down the throat of a Transformer hottie (a.k.a. Dominic Monaghan necking with Megan Fox). They also fight. Some violent fights. Intense fights. Very intense fights. It’s kind of hot.

We also see Eminem in a wheat field! Rihanna with red hair! A bar fight! A house on fire! And…Eminem rapping in a wheat field!

But the bottom line is that this song brings back substance to rap. Either my Zoloft isn’t working, but within the 4 minutes of this song, I actually felt something that a rap song hasn’t made me feel in a while: emotion. It told a story. And the fact that it is being told by two pop culture figures with damaged pasts makes it even more effective. It’s a pretty darn good song.

…did I mention Eminem raps in a wheat field?

You know all those Jonah Hex trailers you have been seeing lately? Well, the movie is just as good as those. In fact, it is just as good as you think it is.

I think I’ll leave it at that.

But there are some decent highlights from this graphic novel turned movie:

1.) Josh Brolin as Hex mumbles a lot and has a cool Phantom of the Opera scar.
2.) Megan Fox wears a corset that shows that she has absolutely no insides.
3.) John Malkovich.
4.) Michael Shannon appears for a hot second.
5.) The gratuitous brawl with some snake mutant dude with a drooling problem.
6.) A crow flies out of Hex’s mouth. Gnarly.
7.) Gob Bluth makes a cameo.
8.) It’s about 81 minutes long…but it felt like eternity.
9.) Ummm…I think that’s about it.

The red band trailer for DC’s horror flick about a girl who eats guys (a literal maneater, mind you) is quite exciting. And by “red band” it means the trailer has the “F” word in it.

Already, I dig the dialog. DC has a knack for the clever discourse with lines like “Nice hardware Ace” and “You need a mani bad, you should find a Chinese chick to buff your situation” and “It smells like Thai food in here – have you two been fucking?” Gasp! The language! I love it.

I love all the Asian references. Normally, I would get in a hizzy because they border on derogatory, but I see it as a shout out. And who doesn’t love Thai food?

It just fuels my stalker-esque admiration for Diablo Cody – and this is just based on a two-minute trailer.

One criticism – is it me or does the poster look too much like the “licking blood off your lips” charm of True Blood? It’s not that I’m mad at it – I’m just sayin’…

…and P.S. I have a thing for the wide-eyed whimsy of Amanda Seyfried and could this possibly be a movie that makes Fox more than a wet-lipped Vixen? With DC in her corner, it is a possibility.

Optimus Prime (voiced by Peter Cullen) gives Sam Witwicky (Shia LeBeouf) a fatherly lecture in a cemetery – because that’s the perfect place for a fatherly lecture

From the moment I saw a caveman on the screen in the opening scene of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, I knew I was in for a bittersweet treat. Yes, you heard that right: caveman. No I am not getting this confused with the lukewarm comedy film Year One (very disappointing by the way), I am talking about our favorite robots in disguise. Autobots. Decepticons. Shia. Megan. The whole shebang – and a shebang it was…sort of.

The second chapter of this robotic saga brings us up to speed with Sam Witwicky (Shia LeBeouf) and his hot, to-good-for-him, girlfriend Mikaela (Megan Fox). He’s going to Princeton, she’s working at a bike shop that requires her to wear Daisy Duke shorts and lip smacking make up. He finds a piece of the Allspark cube from the first movie hidden away in his battle wounded hoodie. He picks it up and that’s when all hell breaks loose.

The little fragment sparks (no pun intended) Sam’s inner Raymond Babbitt/John Nash and he starts seeing these characters and becomes an idiot savant in his Astronomy class. Turns out that the fragment of the Allspark implanted clues in his head to where the Decepticons can find a big ol’ machine that can blow up the sun. In turn, Megatron (voiced by Hugo Weaving) returns from the dead to get some revenge and another ancient badass robot named the Fallen (voiced by Tony Todd) is there with him.

Let me back up for a second.

So it turns out the whole Transformers phenomenon goes way back into time before Megan Fox was getting compared to Angelina Jolie and when men wore loincloths (which would explain the aforementioned cavemen). The Fallen was a part of that crew and he got exiled for wanting to blow up suns and making the whole universe a land suitable for Emo and Scene kids.

Yes, the plot is pretty much your basic “take over the world” storyline with transforming cars. All in all, it’s a muddled storyline eclipsed by really cool and complicated CGI that is too much for the eyes to take in.

Nonetheless, once they figure out Sam has the key to the sun obliterator. The Decepticons go after him with a vengeance, which makes the Autobots spring into action.

Luckily, the Autobots (Optimus Prime, Ironhide, Ratchet and some new annoying twin bots named Mudflap and Skids) have created this budding ro-bromance with a new top secret sector called NEST which includes Josh Duhamel’s character and his band of merry men (Tyrese is included in that mix – and by the way, when is he gonna come out with a new album?).

After all of this is set up, we all get to have an eyegasm of intertwined robots and – all together now – Megan Fox sans Ugg boots and sweats.

One of many scenes in which LaBeouf and Fox run.

Ultimately, the formula went like this: Explosion. Robot. Fight. Transform. Actors run. Repeat that for 144 minutes and you got yourself a sequel with Michael Bay’s name written all over it.

I had a multitude of Transformers when I was a young lad. When I played with them in my suburban home in San Antonio, TX, my fight scenes were more elaborate and exciting – maybe it’s because I often did cross toy product wars with G.I. Joe and sometimes my sister’s Barbie dolls, but that’s neither here or there.

At one point I stopped caring about whether or not Sam was going to get a magical Matrix to (possible spoiler alert) to save a Transformer’s life whose name rhymes with Schmoptimus Crime. Even when the super-Decepticon Devastator showed up on the screen I wasn’t that excited. I had this particular Transformer toy when I was a child. It was basically six construction vehicles (appropriately called Constructicons) that formed together and made a gigantic robot (much like Voltron). It was fluorescent green and purple and it was SO cool. The movie version of the Devastator was like a hybrid of a robotic dog and a vacuum cleaner. Very disappointing.

Bumblebee (voiced by Mark Ryan) kicks some Decepticon boo-tay

This ride of seizure-inducing transforming fight scenes and gratuitous explosions was quite exhausting. And how necessary was it to bring in Isabel Lucas as a evil temptress that weighs as much as a bucket of air? If it was an attempt to produce another hottie, they failed miserably. Fox has the monopoly on that.

Thank God John Turturro (he’s back as the irritating Agent Simmons) and newbie Ramon Rodriguez (who plays Sam’s roommate Leo) were there to provide comic relief amongst the gag-worthy “Who’s going to say ‘I love you first’?” battle between LeBouf’s and Fox’s characters. Honorable mention goes to Julie White and Kevin Dunn as Sam’s kooky parents.

Without a doubt I am a fan of LaBeouf and I admire the signature Spielberg boy-and-alien friendship with the endearing yellow Camaro Bumblebee, but even LeBeouf’s “He’s the next Tom Hanks” charm didn’t give me the summer blockbuster joyride I had with the first one.