Just when I thought I couldn’t whore myself around the Internet anymore, I decided to even elevate my level of social networking whore-ness even more with my new Tumblr page, appropriately called, “Just Dandy.”

It’s basically a supplement of chunky bits of random information that are blog-worthy, but have been blogged about so much that they aren’t worthy of an entire post on this blog.

Does that even make any sense?

It won’t as “formal” as The Finer Dandy, but it will be more like “Oprah After the Show” — a very casual supplement. It will allow me to post more obnoxious, intimate things that give you an insight of my magical life. From food posts to videos to random discourse about aspects of my life that you don’t care about, you can find it all there.

That said, you can follow me on dinoray.tumblr.com.

You won’t regret it…then again, you might.

We came to the conclusion that “Internet speak” defines our current times.

Is it sad that terms such as “LOL” and “OMG” will forever resonate as the idioms of the 21st century?

That aside, we were coming up with more and more textisms that oversaturate our everyday vocal attire: BRB, TTYL, ROTFL, etc. Then, we came upon the term, FTW.

When my students told me that this meant, “Fuck the World” – I was taken aback. Not because I am some vocabulary Puritan, but because I, being the dork that I am, looked it up and read that it meant “For the Win”.

All my students started laughing at me. I never felt like a uncool and unhip university instructor until that very moment. They were pointing, laughing and then they dumped a bucket of pig’s blood on me.

Okay, not really.

Nonetheless, every time I’ve seen FTW in the feed on my Facebook, it made sense that it translated to “For the Win”. Sure, I was skeptical because it sounded kind of lame, but when someone writes, “Banh mi FTW!” I figure they like banh mi so much that they think they are winners – which is positive. It’s uplifting. It gives a sense of accomplishment and that we shouldn’t take the small things in life for granted.

I could see how “Fuck the world” can translate – “Banh mi fuck the world.” Which is basically saying, “I got banh mi mother fuckers – I got some and you don’t – what you know about that?!”

After my students stopped laughing at me, we looked it up on UrbanDictionary.com and – lo and behold – my translation of the cyber acronym was on there as well.

I could’ve gloated and said “I told you so! FTW!” but I didn’t. I am a gentleman.

Still, I can’t help but wonder what is the real meaning of FTW when you use it? Better yet, why can’t there just be one single meaning for FTW?

Then again, why even use it? It’s almost as bad as saying FML.

…but alas, I am a lowly writer and the big wigs at FB don’t care about what I think – but maybe this time, my suggestions can induce change in this social networking site that is becoming a sad excuse of a technological soul for people’s lives – including my own.

That said, if we are going to have to endure another Facebook format change, then I demand the following:

1.) Please include a “People you do not want to know” feed in the margin.

2.) And while you’re at it, you might also want to include a “People you don’t want to have anything to do with” feed.

3.) An option to go back to the “old school” Facebook layout. Wait a second, can Facebook already be “old school?”

4.) Please discourage people to use the term, “Facebook me.”

5.) There should also be an option that publicly announces the “de-friending” of a friend. It’s the perfect solution to breaking up with a friend – everyone has been in that position before. If not, there is definitely someone on your FB that you want to de-friend, but you have just been putting it off because you don’t want to risk hurting their feelings.

Gina wore one black square tip boot on da left and brown pointy tip boot on the right and didn’t notice til the end of the day. Omg!!

I enjoy Facebook, but when someone started this whole 25 Random Things… stuff, I started to get a little iffy. I thought to myself, “Is Facebook starting to travel down that road?” and by that road, I am referring to a path of Xanga-centric self-promotion and tacky questionnaires that make people LOL and cause a whole onslaught of emoticon vomit.

I have started to notice a stream of other “all about me” notes on the popular social networking site. There’s one about one-word answers and another about your first-born (applicable only to mothers of course). I, like every other person, enjoy a nice questionnaire and survey now and then – but when they start to invade Facebook, it could possibly be the kiss of death.

This kind of chain letter malarkey puts a bad taste in my mouth. Sure, it’s just starting with one or two harmless questionnaires. But before we know it, there will be a new quiz or quirky Q&A that will pop up every single hour on Facebook. It will become the equivalent of a Superpoke or any other annoying application that your friends try to send your way (sorry FB friends, no offense – but I just can’t stand it when someone wants me to add a “Pass a Drink” or “Green Patch” app).

In any matter, I just choose to ignore all those applications and once the tidal wave of questionnaires start, I’ll ignore them too. I just hope that all of this won’t make me ignore Facebook. I mean, I actually like the site. I mainly use it to promote all my blogs and post embarrassing pictures of friends and family. But I just don’t want it to explode with mind-numbing surveys and then dissolve into a virtual social networking ghost town – like Myspace (do people still use that site?)

And can you believe after all that ranting, I actually did fill out that “25 Random Things” note. Here it is for all of you who didn’t catch it. Enjoy:

1.) I was once a hustler and pimp in Memphis, but then eventually rose above to follow my dream as a rapper.
2.) It is my dream to move to Chicago because that’s where they film DTV.
3.) I was once assigned detention with four other people and believe it or not, I became lifelong friends with the unlikely bunch. There was a princess, a criminal, a basket case, a jock -and me, the geek. I learned a lot about myself that day.
4.) There was this one time I started this underground club where we would beat the shit out of each other. Turns out, I was just fighting with my other personality.
5.) I once worked at this boarding school place where we had this store called “Over Our Heads” and we also took in this Australian vagabond named Pippa. She was hot.
6.) I was once at this resort in the Catskills and I carried a watermelon. Someone also put me in the corner after Johnny specifically told them not to.
7.) I once found a map of a buried treasure in the attic of my old house in Astoria and my friends and I went on an adventure whilst being chased by a trio of criminals called the Fratellis.
8.) One time, my brothers and sisters had a contest where we built a house of cards to see who would get the remaining checkered trading stamps. Tiger, our dog, knocked down the cards during our turn and we lost the contest because we had a rule where “anything goes.” It was the most depressing day of my life.
9.) My mom hooked up with this guy from outer space (at the time, she didn’t know this) and they made me. As a result, I can freeze time by putting my fingers together. But I still talk with my dad through this glass cube once in a while.
10.) One time, Tommy Page sang at my birthday party. I thought he was in love with me and so did my sister, but it turns out he was just being nice.
11.) I age backwards.
12.) I once had a governess that not only taught me how to sing in play clothes out of curtains, but also taught me about the value of family.
13.) I once lived with a retired football star and this woman with a lesbionic haircut. I called her Ma’am.
14.) I was a member the Mickey Mouse Club teen pop group sensation called “The Party.”
15.) I wrote the theme song to “Doogie Howser, M.D.”
16.) As an overweight teen, I, with the help from my friends, stopped dancing segregation in Baltimore in the late ’50s.
17.) My friend Bill and I once met this guy named Rufus with a time traveling phone booth. His timing couldn’t be any better because we needed to do a history report and make an A or else I would’ve been sent to military school. As a result, we picked up a bunch of historical figures through our adventure through time and ended up getting an A.
18.) When I was living in New York during the 1979, my gang and I had to make it back to our home turf in Coney Island. To make it there, we had to fight a bunch of other gangs. It was a struggle to stay alive. More importantly, it was a test of our brotherhood.
19.) In the ’80s I lived in inner-city L.A. with no future – until Mr. Escalante taught me AP Calculus and changed my life forever.
20.) I once followed a guy I had a crush all the way to New York for college because at our high school graduation in Palo Alto, he wrote a touching note to me in my yearbook. I confessed my love for him and it was awkward, but we remained friends. Despite my crazy roommate with a mysterious box, those were the best four years of my life.
21.) When I was in Catholic school, a successful headlining act in Las Vegas posed as a nun and our music teacher. I was a thug, but she brought out my ability to sing, along with my other classmates.
22.) As an injured hockey player, I was once partnered with this snotty figure skater to become the next big thing in pairs figure skating. I hated her at first, but we eventually fell in love and created a new move called the Pemchenko Twist.
23.) When I was a greaser, my friend Johnny and I got into some trouble with the law. I had to hideout in an abandoned school house in the countryside where I dyed my hair blonde and I read passages from “Gone with the Wind” to kill time. One day, the house caught on fire with a touring group of children. We rescued them and went back to town as heroes. Later that week we had a rumble with the Socs and we kicked ass. That was the greatest day of my life.
24.) I was really into Swing music during Nazi Germany, but my best friend and I, after stealing a radio from a bakery, had to join the Nazi army as punishment, therefore testing our friendship. But I never let go of my love for swing music. Swing heil!
25.) With my blue-gray eyes, I was easily the most popular Geisha in Japan. But that did not bode well with my rival, Hatsumomo. Even so, I learned a lot about myself during those years and I still retain all the class and mannerisms of a Geisha to this day.